Being a fag in a small town is tough. In general. For my boyfriend it was tougher still as getting on the bus to school meant a litany of insults through the day.
He’s not a tough guy, he’s more the cute femmy gay, but he’s got gorgeous eyes and fantastic arms and I have to be honest, he’s got a great ass.
Did that make you uncomfortable? If so, you’re my mom – STOP READING MOM I WARNED YOU – if it made you uncomfortable and you’re not related to me, well, then you’re just a homophobic dick. But despite people like the POTENTIAL YOU (Sorry if you’re not that potential you) there are some serious advantages to being a fag gamer from my generation (born 1983. Yes, I know I’m gay-middle-aged now)
3. You got sex so easily as a teenager
In the 90s gaming was basically an all-boys club. And maybe for this brief period in time (no menstrual pun there, really).
The best way to get to know a guy you wanted to fuck was video games.
I had a lot of guys from Elementary School who I had… uh… fantasies about. I only censor that because it’s so damn creepy and weird to look back on them in school photos and think “Man, I was 12 and I was thinking of doing pornographically intense things to that CHILD– OH GOD I NEED TO CALL THE POLICE AND HAVE THEM ARREST ME 20 YEARS AGO”
Now, the normal thing for straight kids who have crushes to do is to try and get close, and find some way around their parents so they can be alone together (Apparently becoming a parent makes your biggest fear the idea that your progeny may have an orgasm in proximity of someone else their age). And typically the male of our species will try and have some sort of mild sexual experience with the female.
Obviously this didn’t work in the same for a queer guy in the 90s because if I had said to a boy I was attracted to “You should come over to so I can try and bone you” I would be risking rejection and physical assault. But I COULD say “You should come for a sleep-over so we can play Final Fantasy VI”. Easy. If they weren’t gay? Well, video games are fun. And if the guy happened to end up being gay? BAM. You were in. Your parents just thought you were playing video games late at night when instead you were fucking like bunnies. (Well, depending on the costumes you were wearing. I have never understood the bunny-ears appeal)
2. It continues to help in terms of dating.
This entry is short – unlike video games – which is the point. Basically so many awkward dates occur when a couple attracted to each other realize they have less in common than they thought, but again gay guys born in the mid-80s were kind of guaranteed there is some game they have both played, and better still, it was LONG. Games range from 8 to 40 to 60 hours, and it’s a great icebreaker that again didn’t really work as well with most 80s-born straight girls. So the fags of my generation have that one more advantage again.
1. It just continues to get you sex.
While my boyfriend and I have been together for 14 years, the number of guys we’ve made friends with due to our mutual love of games is… quite high. And the number of guys who have made visits to our place to play video games is also quite… high. Even the very few guys who don’t play games (Maybe they’re slightly older, or younger, or just played dress-up as a kid instead because
their family couldn’t afford a SNES) still enjoy a good fighting game or trivia game. And when a guy agrees to visit to play video games? It typically leads to other games. (I TOLD YOU NOT TO READ THIS ONE MOM, DAMMIT).
Obviously, it’s important to remember this applies only to a specific generation, and it’s great that the increase in female gamers means straight teens can hook up more easily.
But the reason that this was such an important topic to me is because it’s how I met my current boyfriend, and because there are so few advantages to growing up gay in the nineties and early noughts, so it’s nice to look back and think that my friends were looking at dial-up porn while I was spending my weekends with a fuck-buddy.